December 31 2015 || Day of Abandonment
The last day of the year. The last day to close out, accomplish, finish, or leave in the previous year what you don't want to take with you into the next.
I've thought a lot about the day our son was abandoned. The day he was left out on a bench. The day his parent/s, no doubt, walked away tearfully from their son. The son they had hoped for for over 9 months. And why his biological parents chose this day. The last day of the year to say goodbye.
Whatever the reason, I will never know. But what I do know is our son's life was forever changed on December 31st. He was found abandoned on a bench of the outpatient area for Obstetrics at the International Peace Maternity & Child Health Hospital with 2000RMB asking to give him care.
I believe his parents knew he had a special metabolic need and that the affordability of his care would be too extreme for them. In China, medical treatment of any kind is expensive. If you don't have the money, you typically do not receive the care or treatment you need. And because Tristan's metabolic need is lifelong, I can only imagine the struggle they felt in that moment, especially in a country that makes care so difficult.
When we first started our journey to adoption, I had a lot of strong feelings towards the parents who would abandon their child/children and literally throw them out. But then I read the book Messages from an Unknown Chinese Mother by Xinran, which rocked my world. It opened my eyes to not only the child abandonment issue in China, but the reasoning behind it and the agony, heartbreak, and torture these parents experience after they leave their child in hopes for a better life.
Abandonment is everywhere. No county is exempt from this. No human is more deserving than another to be rescued and protected.
On December 31st, 2015 Tristan's life was forever changed. The moment his father or mother laid him down on the bench and said their final goodbyes and walked away began a new story, a new chapter, and a new journey. For Tristan, it wasn't the end, but the beginning of something great.
God has been so faithful and so gracious. And on this day, December 31st, 2017, two years to the day his biological parents said goodbye, and a day I guarantee they painfully remember; we hold, cuddle, giggle, play, love, and cherish our son. We are forever connected. And forever grateful that out of the ashes, the pain, and sorrow his biological parents felt, that beauty and healing is being restored.